Perhaps I haven't been very understanding to those who, 'hates studying'.Sigh. I really don't remember when I started having this, fear of studying? I'm so sure I'm not the only one; no doubt there are millions out there who feel the same way too.
Let me explain more about this.
Well actually I don't know where to start. When I think that I'm having exams so soon, and the thought of two year's worth of studying, literally causes me to shed tears. It's not, a fear about failing, I know I won't fail. It really is more about the.. preparation? I have to psyche myself to keep myself in front of my books, to stop myself from thinking about the unending amount of things to read and remember (I KNOW I KNOW it's nothing compared to what some of you guys do, but I really, don't care about that, I'm sorry for being selfish but I just need somewhere to vent).
I cannot think about this and not, cry. I feel so unable to do this. It's never going to end. I think about the definite need of studying - it is 1.5 months to SPM after all - and I end up having a lump in my throat. Not to mention that there is a constant battle in my head/mind; do it- you have to, no I don't want to, you have no choice but to do it, no I cannot do it.
Help. Please. I don't know if you understand. I don't care if you don't understand. Just. Help.
3 comments:
Bzzz... Hey hey...
Thanks so much for your advice.. I guess my perception of my family has already changed. Things are getting better.. Well, thanks yeah!
Studying.. Hmm.. I'm a huge fan of "Don't Want To Study". But I still study sometime. Weirdo. XD
It just takes some motivation to start studying. Sooner or later, fu yoh, Karina can stare at a book without blinking nor sleeping! Just don't follow me, I slept with eyes open before with book, and also with book but eyes closed. Bad attitude last time.. XD
But no matter. The feeling does hurt. About the preps and all. If this does feel better, my family already want me to take which diploma/degree and etc.. I'm only 16!!
Well, I may sound a bit "lala" but I just wanted to tell you, be strong in Him okay? Even though it's odd that I'm younger than you but giving happy happy words, I myself feel weird. But to see my cell leader become like, emo emo like how I used to be, brrr.. cannot let that stay.. :)
Cheers, Karina.. =] Just happened to be checking blogs. Haven't seen you in a long time.. Hey, I know how tough it is to keep studying. I had to go through it as well and i understand. So here's to say, keep at it. You CAN do it, keep refreshing yourself in Him. Everytime you feel like you can't, stop, take a few deep breaths and pray. Cry if you have too, tell Him how you feel. But above all, remember, dear one, that you are not alone in this. You've got a whole youth and family and church to support our dear sister-in-Christ. We will walk through this with you together. =] God bless you, my dear friend. Continuing to lift you up in His name.
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